While I can’t know what you feel, what you are describing sounds like a common example of someone who has a poor sense of self-worth, which in turn is projected onto others.
When you feel like you “can’t say anything right and that I was boring” it is understandable that you would assume others, including your therapist, would think this about you, and thus become distant or disinterested.
My guess would be that this is how you caregivers treated you when you were a young child, or at least how you felt when you were with them. You probably felt like you couldn’t do anything right because they seemed distant or disinterested in you. You probably took their distance as a sign of your lack of self-worth, and internalized this idea about yourself.
The important thing to understand is that these beliefs about yourself do not reflect reality, but are a distortion based on your early experiences. You can even think of it as a survival mechanism during your early years, as it’s much safer to assume we are the problem then to blame those responsible for caring for us, those who we depend on for survival.
This is something you should discuss with your therapist so that they can help you see yourself in a more loving, kinder way. Tell them how you feel. A good enough therapist will understand what is going on.
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